One day, you’ll look back on this moment and feel differently.
Or you could choose to feel differently today.
Sometimes when a person is going through a rough patch, we say: one day you’ll look back on this and laugh.
Not everything fits that prescription though – if you’re currently facing serious loss or hardship, I don’t expect that you’ll laugh about it, even years into the future.
However, you may smile about it.
And I hope that you will.
About yourself, that is, and how you moved through the space in time. We are often so hard on ourselves. We face obstacles, challenges, opportunities, losses and all the growth that comes with, and many of us judge ourselves terribly during these times.
Why do we do that?
Think back to a time in your life, 10 or 20 years ago. Perhaps you were in college, or high school, or even younger. Perhaps you were older than that, raising children.
Did you have struggles?
We all did.
And were you 100% perfect in dealing with them?
Of course not. In fact, you may have had some serious growing pains during that time. If you’re like most people, you made mistakes, and some of those mistakes cost you dearly.
And yet when you look back now, are you able to feel affection for your prior self? Do you see how the younger, less mature version of you was growing and stretching and doing the best that s/he could?
Do you give grace to your prior-self?
I hope so. Because that person deserved it.
And so do you – the person that you are today.
Perhaps your current life is rolling along, going just great, no challenges in sight. If that’s the case, I congratulate you.
And then for the rest of you, I say:
Give yourself grace TODAY. In all that that you are facing in your life right now, there is opportunity. Tremendous, wonderful, golden opportunity. That opportunity is called growth. Growth is when you learn and change, and let me tell you: it doesn’t usually come easy. On the contrary, if things are going easy for you, you’re probably not growing.
Growth lives in the world of discomfort. The world of stretching and pulling and twisting and changing. Growth lives in the world of challenged perspectives, unfamiliar thinking, strenuous habit-building and OH SO MANY unusual feelings.
When you feel uncomfortable, the chances are high that you are growing.
And when you’re growing, you’re learning. Guess what you’re NOT probably doing at that time?
Getting everything right.
That’s right. If you’ve just started something new (like, for example, selling real estate) you might think you’re doing everything terribly. And hey, maybe you are. But who cares? We must crawl before we can walk, before we can run.
If somebody told you that you should be able to jump into any new thing and be perfect, they were lying to you. Including if the one who told you that was you.
Don’t believe the lies.
We all must begin at the beginning. Talent is overrated – you must put in the time and effort to gain SKILL.
By the way, this doesn’t just go for things like selling real estate. This goes for communication, relationships, running, drawing, writing, swinging a kettle bell.
If you want to do it well, you must practice and learn, which will feel uncomfortable.
Imagine yourself ten years from now. You’re looking back on who you were today, and what you were doing. Think of the grace and tenderness that you will offer back to your earlier self. Can you be proud of who you were for working at the uncomfortable thing? I bet you can.
Now bring that grace and tenderness into this day, right now.
You deserve it.
And keep going.